A couple of weeks ago I went down to Universal Studios with a friend to audition for “Universal’s Halloween Horror Nights.” Theme Park acting was never something I aspired to but the prospect of doing a fun event with a friend was something that I very much would have liked to do. It seemed like it would be a lot of fun. I have always liked Halloween even though I must admit that Valentine’s Day is probably my favorite Holiday. I don’t know why because I have never gotten the traditional dozen of American Beauty Red Roses or the traditional box of Valentine’s Day chocolates. At work I would marvel at the many dozens of Roses being sent to co-workers and thinking, what’s up with this, where are my roses? LOL However my spirits were not dampened and I found my own way to be happy on Valentine’s Day.
Getting back to Halloween. I remember how each year my mother made a costume for me and I would go to the school’s Halloween party. Then at night, out for “Trick or Treats.” I always looked forward to this. It was a safer time then and going out was something everyone could do relatively safely. We lived in an apartment complex at that time so there were lots and lots of door bells we could ring and there would always be lots and lots of good quality candy. Hershey bars, Milky Ways, Mars Bars, and my favorite Clark Bars. Which are now hard to come by although I found some oneday at the Turkey Lake rest stop on the Florida Turnpike to my surprise. If I pass that rest stop I check it out sometimes to see if there are more Clark Bars. Although I haven’t been there for over a year so the Clark Bars might be gone. LOL One Halloween I had Chickenpox and missed everything, it seemed like a disaster. Looking out the window and watching all the other children having fun not being able to be a part of it. Being an outsider, being left out.
The audition itself was very much like any acting audition I have been to. I have done my share of auditions when I was still persuing an acting career but that has been a few years ago. At this point I have not been auditioning or even thinking of auditioning much ever again. I might still send out a picture and resume for a film that I might like to try to be in, but this is no longer a priority in my life. However going to this audition seemed like just another fun thing to do. My friend and I spent the day at the park and then in the afternoon headed over to the audition. There we went through the usual audition process of filling out papers, being shuffled into rooms, sitting around, getting on lines and then the final line for the usual dreaded “type-out.” The dreaded “type-out’ is when they send you into the audition room in groups of twenty five or so and the directors ask you questions or just look at you. You usually just say your name and number, oh yes, one is always given a number right at the beginning. You might as well forget your name because now you are this number unless you are one of the lucky people to be picked. Then they start calling you by your name again. It’s magic, you get picked and all of a sudden you get your name back. If you are not picked then they “thank you all so very much” and try to shuffle you out as quickly as possible. My number was 836. It was not lucky, they did not call number 836. I remember hearing number 835, my friend’s number and being thrilled. Then slience, that was the last number called.
The slience seemed endless. I remember glancing at my friend as he had to leave and go with the others who were picked. I was left there with the others who were now being “thanked all so very much.” I felt as if an axe had fallen, I felt alone. I felt like an outsider being left out again, not being able to be a part of it all, not being able to play. Then there was baggage from past auditions and situations that I had long forgotten that seemed to be surfacing. Why I can’t imagine? I guess this was a similar situation that I was in once. My emotions were tailspinning. In reality I knew I was actually over reacting, this was not the end of the world as I knew it, this was after all a job audition and this is what happens in real life job situations. However knowing something intellectually is one thing and emotions are another. I am hoping that the tears that welled up in my eyes were not noticed but I knew they were.
It took me days to sift thru the pain and emotions. I am amazed that this triggered so much emotion and pain. One’s psychology is complex. Things forgotten can suddenly surface by unrelated events. Fears and doubt can rise out of rejection. The important thing, I think, is to be able to see the reality of the situation and also maybe to be able to learn from it. I think I learned a few things.
Hopefully I will get to go to one of the Holloween Horrow Nights. I am interested in seeing it. I am also interested in the type of actresses they hired, I guess there is still a bit of an actress ego in me. LOL Most of all I am interested in seeing some of the great spooky actors. I hear that Universal’s Horror Night are hard core but I know I can handle it. After all I survived the audition!!!
There is a saying; when life gives you lemons make lemonade. I remember wonderful happy moments of drinking lemon-slushy. So I say; when life gives you lemons make lemon-slushy, remember the happy days, look to the future while enjoying the moment.
